"be brief and tell us everything."


Saturday, January 8, 2011

Tyler Durden and Less Clutter (2010)

Holy Connolly. 2011. I’m sure you all are anxiously awaiting my recap of 2010. With a child, quiet moments of reflective thoughts are replaced with making sure she doesn’t eat pennies or toilet paper and listening to Elmo Song. But alas here I am, so let’s start this recap shall we?

February 24, 2010-Let the year of Lola commence! Having a child is everything they say it is: exciting, frustrating, exhausting, beautiful, disgusting, hilarious and so on and so forth. If anything changes your life quicker or faster I am not sure what it is. It certainly has not been easy and I know having a child isn’t for everyone but there are just these moments and experiences you encounter with a child that you cannot replicate with a dog or niece or nephew.

In May, I graduated nursing school on a Saturday and drove to Chicago to see Them Crooked Vultures the following Monday. Best weekend ever? I think so.

After graduation it was time to study for the NCLEX. Basically if you don’t pass this test you don’t become an RN until you do. I studied hard: a couple hours a day, 5-6 days a week. On July 2 after 5 hours and 51 minutes, 275 questions (you read that right: that test was 275 questions long and took me almost 6 hours to take) and 48 hours of excruciatingly painful waiting, I found out I passed. I was officially, legally a Registered Nurse. It was one of the most liberating, exciting and purpose-confirming moments of my life.

(And here is where I pause to say thank you: thank you to my husband, parents and in laws who made the transition into motherhood and from student to full time working girl achievable. I didn’t do it alone and could not have done it without you.)

After an extraordinary (but friggin’ hot) summer, we came home on a Saturday in September to a tampon floating in our hallway. Our entire apartment had flooded with over an inch of sewer water. It’s such a daunting feeling opening your front door and seeing that the things you own have been ruined. Of course its just “stuff” but it was our stuff and we didn’t have “much” to begin with. (I use quotes here not to insult those we actually don’t have much.) Brandon’s computer: gone. Our couch: gone. CD’s from high school: gone. 2 of Lola’s photo albums and the hospital scrub top that Brandon wore during her delivery with her newborn footprints on it: gone. Our down payment for a house savings: now gone to replace the things that were destroyed.

During this time though, I couldn’t help but think about those involved in hurricane Katrina or any other major natural disaster. Some of our things had been spared and eventually we would replace the carpet, douse the place in bleach and be able to move back in. But what if all you could do was sit on your roof, waiting for relief while literally every material thing you own was now floating around in your living room? This thought really put things in perspective and made me thankful things were not worse and empathetic towards those in similar situations.

Globally, 2010 was filled with tragedy, triumph and controversy. The world watched together as 33 Chilean miners were rescued after 69 days below ground and as Spain beat the Netherlands in the 2010 World Cup. Julian Assange induces worldwide panic with WikiLeaks (which is best described as “some Tyler Durden shit”) and Mel Gibson officially loses his mind. WHAT?!

But as in all yearly recaps we look forward to coming days. So what about 2011?

While discussing house buying and finances over coffee one evening (gosh we sound like a riot, don’t we?) my dear friend Craig said, “True satisfaction is delayed gratification.” So what are my resolutions for 2011? Last year my only real goal was to be present, in the moment, looking forward to and prepare for the future but understanding we are only promised this instant. But if last year was focused on the present, may 2011 focus on the future. It may sound bizarre and boring but I want to live a life less cluttered, removed of excess and hasty decisions-from buying clothes, to eating habits to managing our finances. Continuously and daily asking myself, do I really need this 30-dollar headband? Another slice of pizza? Are we ready to buy a home? Is this the medical mission trip I should go on? Or am I just a shopaholic, an overweight American who doesn’t know when to stop, wrongfully eager to keep up with the Jones or too anxious and inexperienced? It’s true: anything worth having is worth waiting (and working hard) for.

Since when did my blog get so serious? Farts, boobies and something about having Jude Laws babies. I’m still here, people.

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